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King Maulgish
King Maulgish is so brave and powerful. It is a known fact that he punched the ender dragon to death and killed the wither by planting wheat. Maulgishography When King Maulgish joined Craft Eternity the first thing he did was punch a tree into diamond blocks. Maulgish's bare hands are enchanted with Fortune V, Sharpness V, and Forceful Touch V. King Maulgish accidentally fell asleep and built Maulgrumpmeoa in twelve seconds, one second for each time the ender dragon had soiled himself after King Maulgish logged in. While sleeping, he snored so loud all of the villagers in Maulgrumpmeoa died and the ground collapsed onto itself. Upon awakening, King Maulgish was so enraged to find that his city could not withstand his snoring, that he crafted cobblestone into an end portal frame and filled the holes with the heads of endermen. When he reached the end, the remaining endermen tried to teleport away, but King Maulgish only allowed their lower halves to teleport away so all of the endermen were decapitated. No one runs from King Maulgish, you either choose Victory or you choose Death. The enderdragon flew high above King Maulgish, afraid of what this glorious orc was capable of. King Maulgish grew tired of the enderdragon's games and lassoed the enderdragon with a lead and tied him to the endstone. King Maulgish readied his fist for a powerful punch but noticed the ender dragons grin. King Maulgish knew what was going on five minutes before he even entered the end dimension, and five minutes before that, and five minutes before that, he knew all along. The enderdragon thought his ender crystals would protect him, he was correct, they would protect him from a clean death. King Maulgish became still for a moment, but only for a brief moment because this wasn't even a challenge for King Maulgish. He channeled his strength into a single punch and hit the enderdragon so hard that the ender crystals exploded from the shockwave. The end stone melted into lava from the sheer awesomeness of the blow. The enderdragon had survived the blow due to his protective shield (only because King Maulgish disliked his arrogance), but was now screaming in pain as the lava destroyed his body. King Maulgish stood ontop of the lava, unharmed from the heat, because after all, he could eat hot pockets straight from the microwave. King Maulgish wanted the ender dragon to suffer for challenging his strength, so King Maulgish punched the enderdragon, holding back most of his strength. The lava solidified leaving a beaten pulp of half of the ender dragon encased in obsidian. King Maulgish threw health potions onto the enderdragon as he punched him, and this went on for half an hour. Finally King Maulgish calmed down and stopped throwing health potions at the enderdragon. As life seeped from the enderdragon's broken body, King Maulgish delived the final blow shattering the enderdragon into a million pieces. King Maulgish left the end without picking up the experience orbs, because an enchanting table could offer him no benefit. King Maulgish returned the overworld, right outside of canobiecrazyville. Canobiecrazy had accused King Maulgish of thievery, an act so dishonorable King Maulgish shuddered at the thought. Canobiecrazy wanted diamonds, he would get diamonds. King Maulgish punched an entire forest down collecting thousands of diamond blocks, the grass instantly died. King Maulgish built a giant diamond statue of himself next to canobiecrazyville, and then pushed it ontop of canobiecrazyville, destroying it permanently. King Maulgish collected the bones of canobiecrazyville's slanderous citizens and crafted wither skulls. The dead grass of the forest had converted to soul sand and King Maulgish was just getting started with his day. King Maulgish summoned the wither, unimpressed with its theatrics. The wither began to wither (of course) all life around King Maulgish. The grass turned to dirt, the trees were reduced to ash, just in general bad stuff was happening. The wither moved in closer to King Maulgish and ineffectively tried to drain his life away. King Maulgish has no life to take, only badass-terone. King Maulgish withdrew his Diamond Hoe, which he enchanted with Efficiency, because King Maulgish HATES farming. The wither was shocked with how little resistance he faced and began to fire wither skulls at King Maulgish. The land around King Maulgish was decimated, but he remained calm and still. Suddenly the wither skulls subsided, it was King Maulgish's turn. Because he is so great, King Maulgish drew his hoe and in one swoop regenerated the land around him. Grass regrew, trees sprouted up from the ground in an instant. King Maulgish made eye contact with the wither, all six of his goddamn eyes. King Maulgish tilled the land in front of him, and brought out a simple wheat seed. King Maulgish is great at killing, but King Maulgish can do anything, so King Maulgish planted the wheat seed in front of him. King Maulgish has killed many people, so he used their souls to grow the wheat plant into the largest wheat plant ever, until he decides to grow another. The wheat sprouted up at such speed and heights that it impaled the wither dozens of times. The wither shuddered then exploded into a thousand wheat plants all over the world, and that is how King Maulgish fed the world. King Maulgish was tired (not literally because that is impossible) from boredom and retreated to what would become Smileytime. King Maulgish's Gas Problem King Maulgish is also widely known for his extreme gas problems. Experts agree that Maulgish's destructive personality is a direct result of his insecurity regarding his flatulence. Personfrommars was killed for such blasphemous words. King Maulgish has no problems, only solutions.